Light Versus the Dark: "We Are Winning the War"

November 4, 2013

Dear Parents, Mom and Dad/Dad and Mom,

Thanks for everything. A lot of this mission thus far seems to be personal struggles, trying to become a better person. 

Essentially, I know I will face the dark continually as a beacon of light, especially here out in the field and with my career choice. I understand that. Every day, I am learning more about trusting God and the Lord, which trust is hard for me to sometimes give. I pray, I should be now, openly, alone to commune aloud with God. 

I do admit that I do have personal struggles. All I know is that day by day it will get better and that fulfilling my mission goals will help with all my problems. I have been praying a lot on all things.  My mission goals seem to be inspired and the reason why I have goals is, because, seeing as interviews are coming up (November 7 with mission president), President Wilson wanted us to make goals.  I know what I need to do. I need to do whatever God wants me to do, so I can be the person he wants me to be. There are things that I need to do on my own; I just need your support in ways that are not advice or help that is specific in certain directions. If you feel inspired at all, go ahead, maybe I will see it that way. Thanks for everything.

There is one thing that I do need to do now. I struggle a lot with identity and so far, I feel as though I have split between a secular identity and gospel identity, that I am trying to merge. Again, do not give me advice on this or anything like that. I have things to figure out with God. But, just keep on reading. So, who am I? I could tell you my name, that I am a child of God (which I will inevitably do), and many other things, but regardless, the question still stands. What answers this question that I pose is what makes me, me. I am a man of study, of scholar. I read, I write, I study. The most fun, the enjoyment I get out of life is studying, is to read. I have a list that I carry with me of all things that I would like to learn. I am spending my life learning; it is one purpose to life. I am a man of psychology. I love the mind. It is a puzzle in itself. I love behavior, in why we do certain things as well as the abnormalities of the mind. I find the mind so fascinating; I find it as evidence of God. I am a man of law. I find the law interesting. I was reading the Book of Mormon and I read about law in Alma and some of the Nephite law and it was so interesting. That is why I want to be a forensic psychologist. I may not understand fully what I am about to do, but, hey, I am willing to do it. I like different cultures. I love the different languages; I do not care about their talent in singing, I just care about the tale behind the song and the beauty of a different language. I find it fascinating to know these things. I find Judaism, fascinating, because of the history of it in the Bible. I love musicals and operas. Music becomes the story. The different pitches, or whatever, help convey the emotion, the personality behind a character. I wish I would have known this earlier; listening to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and their CD, "Showtime," I am envious in the fact that I have not heard of some musical. I love a good story. I understand if this all seems a bit worldly, but what I just put is part of who I am. Another part is the gospel side. This 2 years is just time for me to be spiritual. This is a life long commitment. I want to dedicate my life in following Christ. I may be quiet, but I am great listener. I can listen with love. I can speak what testimony that I do have. I am a child of God and what hope and happiness that simple phrase brings. Every soul is worth something to God. He loves us. I am a Melchizedek Priesthood holder. I may not understand it at this current time, though I am a bit unsure exactly what I am seeking (that will come in time), but I know it is God's power, it is authority. I have been called to bear the priesthood and do all that it entails. I may not have realized it earlier, but I am starting to do so. I am a disciple of Christ. I will follow Him, for I know that He lives. I am a bearer, a beacon of light. I will not be hid.

So, this week was a good week, despite all our appointments falling through (well, most). A lot of service was performed. Lots of raking. But, fall is definitely here. It it getting a bit chillier. My electric blanket will have to suffice as my source of warmth, seeing as I do not have my dog with me. Oh, which reminds me I was really happy to see a boxer, yesterday. My companion was able to baptize someone that he taught in his previous area. That person was taught for a while, brought a friend along, and then, moved up here to go to school. And the mission split and Fredericksburg became part of the Virginia Richmond mission. My companion got transferred up here, they saw each other, and the person asked him to baptize them. It was great to see that. And the sisters here are getting people on date, which is really good. One of their investigators was sick and they were teaching her when one of the sister missionaries felt prompted to talk about the priesthood and priesthood blessings. We got a call a bit later from the sisters while doing service, because the investigator really wanted a blessing right then and now. My companion performed it and mentioned something that he did not know, but the sisters and the investigator earlier talked about. Plus, after the blessing, the investigator was happy as can be; she had a lot of energy and kept on chatting up a storm. This week was also Halloween and the ward's Trunk-or-Treat. My companion and I were the judges for the chili cook-off. So, after a while, chili starts to taste the same, so you have to remember which ones that stuck out the most. It was great. Plus, at the end, my companion and I brought tupperware, so we were able to snatch a few of the leftovers to last us a while. Plus, when members offer for us to take food home to eat, we gladly take, although I am a bit hesitant with the dessert. We seem to have a lot in the apartment, seeing as Halloween just came by.

All is well.

Love,Elder S. Todd

Government Shutdown, Mental Illness, Tornado Warning - October 7, 2013

Dear Parents of Mine, Mom and Dad/Dad and Mom,

Yes, I will make sure that I obtain gloves for the coming times. The mornings are definitely chilly, but it does warm up in the afternoon. Today, we might have a storm. The leaves are changing color and I am keeping my eye out for some good shots. It is yet to be that colorful, but soon it might. It is going to be a better fall than what it is like in California where the leaves just turn brown and fall. I did learn how to use macro on my camera, so whenever I will be able to attain the ability to give you my pictures, you will see different flowers, a spider and a caterpillar. My bike is good for being chainless; I do have to pump the tire, but it is all good.

I absolutely loved conference! (A semi-annual world-wide conference broadcast in several languages via satellite, cable and the internet to congregations in all parts of the world)There were not so many funny stories, but there were interesting moments. How did you like the fly that wanted to be on camera? In some moments of conference, I was a bit distracted for whatever reason, but I paid attention for most of it. I was actually surprised at how fast it went. I was really engaged and I find it so sad that I was never this engaged. But, conference was actually quite foreboding and there were a lot of calls to repentance and voices of warning. I loved David A. Bednar's talk on tithing. In fact, David A. Bednar is one of my favorite apostles. There is an MTC video called the Character of Christ where David A. Bednar is talking to the MTC about the character of Christ and how we should have it. It is not available to the public, but maybe the missionaries at home know about it and can tell you about it. I loved Uchtdorf's talk which was a plea to those that left the church to come back and told everyone why this is the Lord's church. It is an excellent talk. I did watch priesthood session, though I want to reread those talks. The reason why I say that the conference was a bit foreboding was in two separate talks there were some warnings for the future. Robert D. Hales, I believe Saturday Morning talk, essentially said that soon we will be persecuted as the early saints. What is even more, the talks of other sessions of conference talked about conversion to the gospel and having spiritual strength. And then, Dallin H. Oaks said that we would be discriminated against. There are talks I would love to reread, because I liked to look out for these things and look for guidance. I believe it was Holland that gave an excellent talk on mental illness. In short, conference was powerful.

My companion is being transferred. Yes, he does have his unusual quirks as do I. I always knew he was going to leave, because it was time. He had been here for nearly nine months, if not nine itself. I do not know where he is going or who I am going to be with. But, in short, I will have to maintain the area, lead it. Not so scared about it, though it is going to be a challenge. My companion is a good person. Even when he reminded me of the cartoon character Spongebob when he screamed when the light turned yellow and he was coming to the intersection, even when he annoyed me, even when I was completely disgusted at his unsanitary practices, Elder Meibos is a good person at heart. He cares for the people and he is attached to them. He has built this area up and now he has to leave what he was created. The work has been exploding. He wants to stay, but again, it is time. He does his best to support me and I do trust him. It was a good to have a companion that I had some interests that were similar. He did not mind my quirks, whatever they may be. All in all, he is a good person.

I am glad to hear that people are interested in this work. Hopefully, it will spark an interest or at least the seed will be planted. I may visit the lady again, but I will pray about it. I do want to say thank you for the support that you are doing to help move along missionary work. I love you for the work you are putting in. I am glad that you are fellowshipping and inviting investigators to come over. It really does help. Keep at it!

This week has been interesting to say the least. On Monday, I went to Chatham Manor and downtown Fredericksburg. My companion took me to several antique shops. There are some interesting things, especially old books. Chatham Manor is absolutely gorgeous and interesting. On Tuesdays, I go to the family history center (at least sometimes). There is work to be done. I love family history and I love to know more about them. So, I am doing what I can with that.

The government shutdown has affected a lot of members here in Virginia. I see the importance of food storage. It is not only for natural disaster, but also times when money is not coming in. A lot of people are furloughed, but there is a plus side to it all. That plus side is missionary work. A lot of people are home that normally would not be. So, we have two investigators thanks to the furlough days. Other than that, I am also grateful that I do not have to worry as much about the government shutdown.

Well, I have an interesting situation. So, two times that I have been on exchanges, my companion and whoever he is with, goes to these duplexes that look like apartments. He found at least one person. We lost contact with that person and then finally got back in contact. But, as it turns out, this is pretty much a health clinic for the mentally ill and these are supervised apartments. Now, before, you cry out as to think I am taking advantage of them, I am not. From my limited knowledge on psychology and as what I can tell, they are functioning as to think and function on their own. These apartments are just supervised and help give them structure. Of course, I, also, did not know this about the place and thought it was mix of office apartments until the people started talking about their problems. Either way, they want us back, they love what we teach, and they accept the Book of Mormon without hassle. On the unfortunate side, the staff is not too happy about our visits. They believe we are soliciting when we are not. I would honestly like to back out of it, because I am thinking rules that we might be hindering, and so on and so forth. But, like I said, the people want us back. In fact, when they told us that we were soliciting, in the middle of a lesson, I felt so uncomfortable until I was comforted by the investigator when she said that, "Oh, do not worry about them. I will leave a note to them to say that you people are fine and not a bother." So, the situation looks as if it might begin to be under control. (Sounds like Seth's Psychology degree may come in handy. He studied everything from abnormal psychology to personal psychology. Perhaps this is why he was sent to this area.)(See also Elder Holland's talk "Like A Broken Vessel" http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng )

I do not have much time left. In fact, I will finish this later. I am sorry for the abrupt ending, but there is a tornado warning and the staff are saying leave or go to another room for safety. I cannot finish at this time. I love you.

Love,

Elder S. Todd

P.S. First tornado warning in my life!

(Second letter sent a few hours later.)

Dear Parents,

Look! I'm alive! So, no tornado. Just a warning. The rain was really coming down. It was really hard to see. And because I needed to do laundry, every week, we drove eight miles back to our residence. At one point, another car accidentally splashed a ton of water that luckily did not kill our car's engine and cause an accident. I could not see, but I knew to go straight. And my companion screamed.

So, I left off with the duplexes. The people are quite functional. In fact, one of them walked all the way to library in the rain.

Not much else happened that was interesting of note. Conference was great. I still think there were a lot of warnings. My companion did mention the fact that they did not mention temples and if we are to be persecuted as the saints of old, then perhaps temple work would be on hold. I do not know; I can only guess. I am just noting what I heard and watching for the signs of the times. Speaking of the signs of the times, I want to know more. I know I have a book on it called 60 Signs of the Second Coming. Now, do not send it, but would it be possible, if it is not packed up, to send the scriptural references as well as what sign those scriptures reference? If it is packed up, then just leave it packed up.

I watched conference at two different members houses. It was fun and I got fed. Conference is really awesome.

So, I guess all I needed to say, was that I am alive even in these stormy weathers. I am wearing the boots that were sent and a jacket that I took from the old apartment. It is interesting to drive with boots.

All is well!

Love,

Elder S. Todd

P.S. No the jacket is not trenchcoat, but it fits and it is a bit long. It is a good long as it is trenchcoat-like and it keeps me for the most part dry. And because of our jackets and my companion's name, Meibos, the computer sign-up lady thought there was a Harry Potter festival or something like it going on.

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad. -C.S. Lewis

#www.facebook.com/ElderSethTodd #ldsmissionary

August 19, 2013 - Miracles - Service - Servants of Jesus Christ

Dear Parents,

It is so good to hear from you, even if it is a small letter as this. (All that I have received is the postscript, which I am grateful for and I am not sure if there is more. In any case, I am grateful.) I got mom's letter and I do plan on writing back as soon as possible. I also got Mom's invite to Google Plus, which I do not believe that I will be able to go on. I do thank you for that. I am sorry to hear that you are dealing with ants. They seem to be quite a bother.

My week here has been one of the best thus far. My companion and I had received a "mormon.org" referral. We did not have a set appointment and so we decided to go knock that door after doing service. My companion had forgotten his dress shoes and so we had to drive back to our apartment to get his shoes. We got there and knocked on his door. It did not look as though anyone was home, but we tried anyway. The thought came to my head to expect a miracle. I rang the doorbell and the door swung open and this muscular black man is at the door. We gave our statement as to who we are, "We are servants of Jesus Christ." He replied to us, "Come on in." Well, that does not happen that often and I was quite honestly expecting the door to close on us, seeing that the last Mormon.org referral cancelled on us. I was taken aback and we went inside. He was talking to his friend that referred us to him on the phone and she was happy that we were there. We shared the Restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the Spirit was there strongly. He wanted to be baptized, to read the Book of Mormon. We called him a few days ago and he said he was ready to turn his life over to Christ.

The same day, we had an appointment for this Baptist woman, but that day was not the right day for her due to unfortunate circumstances. Despite this, we decided to try a few people nearby who said that they might be interested. We saw this girl who we had given a pass-along card and who had invited us back to talk to her family. She brought her mother, who told us, "I already know of the Mormon church and I am not interested." We persisted and asked her if there was anything we could do for her. She told us, "No, there is not anything... Well, do you have gas money?" We gave her some and it softened her heart where she let us in and told us a few personal stories of how she came to believe in Christ. My companion and I shared our testimonies of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. She pulled out a Book of Mormon that she had found on the ground one day outside her little townhouse. She said she felt full and we made an appointment to come back. As we were leaving the neighborhood, there was a man on a bike, who shouted at us, "Mormons!" We stopped our car and rolled down the window. He told us where he lived and invited us back. (We believe we met with him again and he tried preaching to us.)

The next day many of our appointments fell through, so we decided to try a few referrals. We got two new people who are potentially interested, though one of them was not a referral. God has helped us find new people and has shown us who is prepared. This week has been a miracle in that way. And while, yes, it was disappointing to not see them at church this Sunday, I was comforted in that fact that I had sowed seeds.

I did more service on Saturday for an Eagle Scout project. This young man that I was helping decided to put on a 5k Run for Canned Food. People would come to donate canned food and join the race. It was huge success for the young man, because a lot of non-members were there. I was a race marshal along with my companion. I had to go in the middle of traffic and stop it, so that the runners would be able to cross the street. I even helped other joggers, who were not part of the race, cross the street. Nobody wanted to kill me for stopping the road, which was great. Though, there was this man who was not going to wait and took his opportunity to go when he could. But, it was a lot of fun helping people cross the street. I walked the race at the end to pick up the signs that pointed the way.

I have been assigned to give a talk this upcoming Sunday on preaching the gospel. I am really excited and I have a few quotes down. I am not writing anything, but the introduction. I have created an outline, but other than that, I will rely on God and tend to the talk throughout the week. I also realized a few things this week about me personally. I love to sing and I have been learning some of the hymns. I learned Master, the Tempest is Ragingand I am working on A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief and School Thy Feelings. I do want to learn other hymns and other musical songs (though that will be a long while away). It also struck me that I should be a forensic psychologist and on the side, be a victims counselor. I feel as though the Lord has helped me realize a few things and I know that the Lord will help provide for me.

Also, thank you for all that you do for me and for sending me the list of birthdays. I now know when to wish people happy birthdays!

I hope everything is going well.

Love,

Elder S. Todd

Footnote to the above post which is a letter our son sent to us:

My son received a postscript to a letter that I had written him in the form of a short email. The letter that I thought I had sent him was in a draft folder. The postscript message had a different signature message than the original letter. So it was quite interesting to see him mention the word miracle twice in his letter. The letter that was sent to him that he received after writing the above letter included the following quote from Albert Einstein: "There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; or you can live as if everything is a miracle." Also note, that his mother always chooses a quote from Pinterest to include in his letter. That quote is what you see included in this post. Notice that it is a quote from Ezra Taft Benson and also mentions "miracles." Was it just a coincidence that we sent him those particular quotes unknowingly to him or was it inspiration? I would think it was the latter. Life is full of miracles. -Stephen Todd, Seth's Father